I speak up in small groups. But when people organize for political action and represent themselves as "the Havurah group" (without a congregation-wide vote on what positions/candidates/measures to support or oppose), and when the rabbi's Rosh Hashanah speech (you can't call it a sermon, there was very little religion in it) affronts me so badly I wanted to walk out of services, I feel too alienated to make connections.

I want a shul where differences are tolerated and people are welcome to find others who agree with them and to learn from the ones who don't agree with them. I'm not getting that where I am.

But then, for a Jew I'm a contradiction. I'm pro-gun, anti-tax, in favor of smaller government and more personal responsibility. I don't fit in with the Orthodox because I'm also egalitarian (about women's involvement in services) and generally quite liberal on social issues.