Rivka, I love your detailed list of when one can ask and how. At the same time, anyone not willing to study and memorize such a detailed list (self-educate) is best advised to go with the simple: when in doubt, don't ask, don't comment, and don't offer help.

I trust fairoriana to be willing to think carefully and learn from feedback. Another person might've gotten a different response from me.

I would say "don't help," not "don't offer help." As long as people are willing to wait for a response before jumping in, I think that offering help is generally acceptable.