I've had variations on this kind of conversation. We live in a confessional age, and lots of people don't seem to believe in privacy.
There are a number of things, because of what I do, which people ask me... some (like what kinds of torture I prefer/think work best) get a fairly stock, and more polite/educational/lecturing, than not, answer.
Some get, "That's none of your business." It is amazing to me the number of people who then tell me it is.
Admittedly, at that point they aren't trying to be friendly... but even if they were, that doesn't excuse it.
If she wanted to apologise, she needed to know that it might be painful... she assumed she hurt your feelings (why she thinks her presumption is going to do anything other than annoy/anger you, I've no idea... but then I happen to be a fan of letting people be, and never know what to do about asking after friends disabilities, much less strangers... at Walter Reed it was easy... we had something in common, but outside of that... sheesh) she had to be willing to face those feelings, or just let you walk away.
I'm sorry she had a bad day. I'm sorry her pissing you off made it worse, but she did it. It wasn't your fault she was rude, and it wasn't wrong to tell her so.
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Date: 2004-07-26 12:43 pm (UTC)I've had variations on this kind of conversation. We live in a confessional age, and lots of people don't seem to believe in privacy.
There are a number of things, because of what I do, which people ask me... some (like what kinds of torture I prefer/think work best) get a fairly stock, and more polite/educational/lecturing, than not, answer.
Some get, "That's none of your business." It is amazing to me the number of people who then tell me it is.
Admittedly, at that point they aren't trying to be friendly... but even if they were, that doesn't excuse it.
If she wanted to apologise, she needed to know that it might be painful... she assumed she hurt your feelings (why she thinks her presumption is going to do anything other than annoy/anger you, I've no idea... but then I happen to be a fan of letting people be, and never know what to do about asking after friends disabilities, much less strangers... at Walter Reed it was easy... we had something in common, but outside of that... sheesh) she had to be willing to face those feelings, or just let you walk away.
I'm sorry she had a bad day. I'm sorry her pissing you off made it worse, but she did it. It wasn't your fault she was rude, and it wasn't wrong to tell her so.
TK