Jun. 23rd, 2009

rivka: (Rivka P.I.)
Lydia and I got invited to come to the clinic where we do our research and present our data to the staff. That was this morning. When it was my turn, I introduced the basic concepts underlying my study, focusing on the HIV conspiracy beliefs because that's what I already have data on.

"Conspiracy theories have been found to be common in the general African-American population," I finished, "but no one has ever looked at whether patients in treatment have conspiracy beliefs. I think the assumption has been that once people are diagnosed and come into treatment, we give them education, they talk to their doctor, and they adopt accurate beliefs about HIV. But no one has ever checked to be sure that's what happens, until my study."

Then, before I put up my preliminary results slide, I asked them how many clinic patients they thought would endorse conspiracy theories.

"I have some patients," said one of the nurse practitioners.

"How many?" I asked her. "Five percent? Fifty percent?"

"No, no, just a few."

The nurse manager chimed in. "Early in the epidemic, I would say a lot of people. But not that many anymore."

I put up the results slide. There was a brief silence. Then the clinic's medical director asked quietly,

"This is from our clinic?"

Here's what the slide said. The numbers indicate the percentage of patients who agree or strongly agree.

36.8% The government created HIV.
42.1% A secret cure exists.
43.9% Drug companies don’t want a cure.
21% HIV is a genocidal plot.
22.8% Doctors experiment unfairly on minorities.
17.6% Doctors give experimental treatments without consent.
17.5% HIV does not cause AIDS.

"Okay," I said after I reviewed the results and gave them time to sink in. "Now imagine that you hold these beliefs, and you come to the clinic, and your doctor tells you, 'I want to give you these medicines, and it's okay because they've been approved by the government, and besides, the government is going to pay for them.' "

There was uneasy laughter.

And here's the scary thing: this is probably the best-case scenario, because these are the patients who actually come to clinic. If I surveyed people who aren't connected to care at all, I'm guessing that the numbers would be even higher.

"That was fascinating," said the medical director afterward. She still looked kind of stunned. "You're definitely going to get this published." I'm planning to write it up and submit it to journals this summer, instead of waiting for more data to trickle in. Because, yeah, I think HIV medical providers just have no idea.
rivka: (psych help)
It's been two weeks since I had an anxiety attack.

I am still having occasional irrationally negative and self-critical thoughts, but no more than I ever did - I'd say that they now fall within the normal range. I haven't had to marvel at my own craziness in at least two weeks.

Probably not coincidentally, it's been two weeks since I increased my Prozac dose. It looks like I've found the right level for me. It's quite a low dose - 10mg, which is the smallest pill they make - so I'm not too worried about side effects or milk pass-through.

I go back to the psychiatrist at the end of July. From what she's said before about nursing hormones mediating my anxiety, I'm guessing that she'll want me to stay on the Prozac at least until solids start making up a significant portion of Colin's diet and/or I stop pumping. I'm okay with that.

I post this partly to encourage other people. Postpartum mental illness is treatable. Don't delay seeking help.

Profile

rivka: (Default)
rivka

April 2017

S M T W T F S
      1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
30      

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Jun. 9th, 2025 03:31 pm
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios