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Jun. 14th, 2010 03:15 pmYesterday I suddenly found myself barely able to walk. That was strange.
I had some twinges in my hip (the artificial one; or rather, the flesh and bone around the artificial one, given that the titanium parts can't feel anything) yesterday afternoon. It didn't surprise me because thunderstorms were predicted, and I often have some pain with changes in the weather.
But then, without warning, in the evening I couldn't put enough weight on that leg to walk normally. There wasn't the intense pain I would have had before the hip was replaced. Instead there was an overpowering feeling of weakness. I lurched all over the place when I tried to walk. It felt, I don't know, like it might feel if you tried to walk on your elbow: it's not agonizing, but there's simply no fucking way it's going to work, because your elbow was not meant to hold your weight.
I can't even describe how surreal it is to have something go wrong like that without it hurting a lot. Of course I did feel some pain: below the artificial joint at the top back of the femur, and at the inside edge of the pelvis. It was noticeable, but pretty minor stuff. It's strange to be reminded again, so strongly, that the parts of my body that hurt me for years are simply gone.
When we got home I took some naproxen and got out my cane, and with the help of those two things I was pretty much fine. Today I feel fine - a little sore in the same places, and disinclined to run a marathon, but fine. I am limping, but not more than usual.
I am thinking, though, that I might have just gotten a postcard from my future. I have always known that my artificial hip will only be good for so long. They promised me 15-20 years, which seemed like forever when I got the surgery at age 23. Now I'm 36 and my artificial hip is 13 years old. Is this what they feel like when they're starting to wear out? I wonder.
This might have been just one of those weird things that happens, and a sign that I need to unearth my old physical therapy exercises and get to work strengthening the muscles around the artificial joint. Or maybe this is the beginning of a decline in my mobility, heading towards a second hip replacement.
I try to think about how that would look. I am really remarkably functional and mobile for someone who used to have such severe arthritis. I would have a long way to fall before things got objectively bad. I could take anti-inflammatories regularly again, for example, or use a cane outside the house, or both, and those things would buy me a lot more time. I wouldn't want to have surgery again before Colin is at least three. I'd also need to time it around my planned future submission of an R01 grant.
My weird little episode yesterday might not have anything to do with my future. I do know that. But even if it was just a glitch that doesn't repeat, it reminded me that my hip will wear out someday, and that I am approaching the range I was quoted.
Which is a very strange thing.
I had some twinges in my hip (the artificial one; or rather, the flesh and bone around the artificial one, given that the titanium parts can't feel anything) yesterday afternoon. It didn't surprise me because thunderstorms were predicted, and I often have some pain with changes in the weather.
But then, without warning, in the evening I couldn't put enough weight on that leg to walk normally. There wasn't the intense pain I would have had before the hip was replaced. Instead there was an overpowering feeling of weakness. I lurched all over the place when I tried to walk. It felt, I don't know, like it might feel if you tried to walk on your elbow: it's not agonizing, but there's simply no fucking way it's going to work, because your elbow was not meant to hold your weight.
I can't even describe how surreal it is to have something go wrong like that without it hurting a lot. Of course I did feel some pain: below the artificial joint at the top back of the femur, and at the inside edge of the pelvis. It was noticeable, but pretty minor stuff. It's strange to be reminded again, so strongly, that the parts of my body that hurt me for years are simply gone.
When we got home I took some naproxen and got out my cane, and with the help of those two things I was pretty much fine. Today I feel fine - a little sore in the same places, and disinclined to run a marathon, but fine. I am limping, but not more than usual.
I am thinking, though, that I might have just gotten a postcard from my future. I have always known that my artificial hip will only be good for so long. They promised me 15-20 years, which seemed like forever when I got the surgery at age 23. Now I'm 36 and my artificial hip is 13 years old. Is this what they feel like when they're starting to wear out? I wonder.
This might have been just one of those weird things that happens, and a sign that I need to unearth my old physical therapy exercises and get to work strengthening the muscles around the artificial joint. Or maybe this is the beginning of a decline in my mobility, heading towards a second hip replacement.
I try to think about how that would look. I am really remarkably functional and mobile for someone who used to have such severe arthritis. I would have a long way to fall before things got objectively bad. I could take anti-inflammatories regularly again, for example, or use a cane outside the house, or both, and those things would buy me a lot more time. I wouldn't want to have surgery again before Colin is at least three. I'd also need to time it around my planned future submission of an R01 grant.
My weird little episode yesterday might not have anything to do with my future. I do know that. But even if it was just a glitch that doesn't repeat, it reminded me that my hip will wear out someday, and that I am approaching the range I was quoted.
Which is a very strange thing.
