Well, I have a serious problem with the "title" "boob_nazi", too. But, well, someone has to be in there to say "Actually, no, in the prehistoric golden age, a lot of babies *starved to death*" occasionally. I expect I'll burn out soon though. I only barely survived the "I allowed my baby to feed herself before six months because she seemed ready" wars.
Which isn't to say that I'm not ashamed of being seen to be part of a group like that, and that I don't think it's going to hurt people. I am sorry that it hurt you. I hope that you have an idea of what I really think, and where I differ from whoever wrote the community info.
It is easy to make breastfeeding unnecessarily more difficult than it needs to be. The problem is that, like my c-section, there's no distinction made between necessary and unnecessary when extremists are making snap-judgements about other people. I also think that old mothers don't give new mothers half the ... understanding ... they need for the hormonal cocktail they're on, even before you factor in sleep deprivation and stress over feeding problems.
I believe that if most of society had extensive experience of breastfeeding - if everyone tried it, pretty much, and everyone saw it as absolutely normal - there'd be fewer problems because they'd be diagnosed a lot faster. I believe this mainly because of the situation in Sweden, where 98% of women *start* breastfeeding, and they have a correspondingly higher number of people still feeding at 6 weeks, 6 months etc.
But I also believe that even one obstacle is enough to make it almost impossible for a woman without adequate support. My friend Hiroko's baby very nearly starved to death, due to what we now think was undiagnosed silent reflux, but obviously we can't tell for sure. We now guess she stopped nutritive sucking *entirely*. She had no symptoms other than failure to thrive. Her latch looked fine. She had a very strong suck on things like fingers. Hiroko could express milk by hand in a way I've never managed unless engorged. Baby lost weight. And lost weight. No-one had any idea what to look for. I didn't know her well enough at the time to say "Please, give her formula," because I did know that she had refused to do that when her mother-in-law (who had never breastfed) told her to.
I'll never forget when I saw that baby after her first week of unlimited formula. NEVER.
If it was silent reflux, then it's pretty easy to treat, in the absence of other problems - and other problems were checked for, extensively. So yeah, she could have breastfed. Of course she could. If anyone had had any idea where to look for the information she needed - and *no-one* did. None of the health visitors, midwives, paediatricians, breastfeeding advisors, mothers and mothers in law, no-one.
So who cares if Sweden can manage it? The UK can't yet. That means that some women in the UK who *could* breastfeed if [life was totally different] just fucking CAN'T.
But what do I know? I feel guilty even now for not having discharged myself from hospital as soon as someone suggested an epidural. Clearly I am weak and unwomanly.
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Date: 2006-04-12 08:25 pm (UTC)Which isn't to say that I'm not ashamed of being seen to be part of a group like that, and that I don't think it's going to hurt people. I am sorry that it hurt you. I hope that you have an idea of what I really think, and where I differ from whoever wrote the community info.
It is easy to make breastfeeding unnecessarily more difficult than it needs to be. The problem is that, like my c-section, there's no distinction made between necessary and unnecessary when extremists are making snap-judgements about other people. I also think that old mothers don't give new mothers half the ... understanding ... they need for the hormonal cocktail they're on, even before you factor in sleep deprivation and stress over feeding problems.
I believe that if most of society had extensive experience of breastfeeding - if everyone tried it, pretty much, and everyone saw it as absolutely normal - there'd be fewer problems because they'd be diagnosed a lot faster. I believe this mainly because of the situation in Sweden, where 98% of women *start* breastfeeding, and they have a correspondingly higher number of people still feeding at 6 weeks, 6 months etc.
But I also believe that even one obstacle is enough to make it almost impossible for a woman without adequate support. My friend Hiroko's baby very nearly starved to death, due to what we now think was undiagnosed silent reflux, but obviously we can't tell for sure. We now guess she stopped nutritive sucking *entirely*. She had no symptoms other than failure to thrive. Her latch looked fine. She had a very strong suck on things like fingers. Hiroko could express milk by hand in a way I've never managed unless engorged. Baby lost weight. And lost weight. No-one had any idea what to look for. I didn't know her well enough at the time to say "Please, give her formula," because I did know that she had refused to do that when her mother-in-law (who had never breastfed) told her to.
I'll never forget when I saw that baby after her first week of unlimited formula. NEVER.
If it was silent reflux, then it's pretty easy to treat, in the absence of other problems - and other problems were checked for, extensively. So yeah, she could have breastfed. Of course she could. If anyone had had any idea where to look for the information she needed - and *no-one* did. None of the health visitors, midwives, paediatricians, breastfeeding advisors, mothers and mothers in law, no-one.
So who cares if Sweden can manage it? The UK can't yet. That means that some women in the UK who *could* breastfeed if [life was totally different] just fucking CAN'T.
But what do I know? I feel guilty even now for not having discharged myself from hospital as soon as someone suggested an epidural. Clearly I am weak and unwomanly.
Er.