I have one concern, though. If we're supposed to listen to people of colour talk about their experience by just sitting there and listening, without chiming in with experiences we've had where we've felt similarly, then this means refraining from doing something that is simply a part of everyday conversation. I know from my work in conversation analysis that telling a little anecdote from your own life is a normal, useful way for a co-conversationalist to convey empathy with the person who's narrating some aspect of *their* life. It's not "egocentric," it's typical conversational style.
It sounds to me like you're suggesting that white people should talk with people of colour about their experiences as a therapist might talk with a client, instead of as a friend or an ally. Isn't there a level on which that's problematic?
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Date: 2006-06-04 02:02 pm (UTC)I have one concern, though. If we're supposed to listen to people of colour talk about their experience by just sitting there and listening, without chiming in with experiences we've had where we've felt similarly, then this means refraining from doing something that is simply a part of everyday conversation. I know from my work in conversation analysis that telling a little anecdote from your own life is a normal, useful way for a co-conversationalist to convey empathy with the person who's narrating some aspect of *their* life. It's not "egocentric," it's typical conversational style.
It sounds to me like you're suggesting that white people should talk with people of colour about their experiences as a therapist might talk with a client, instead of as a friend or an ally. Isn't there a level on which that's problematic?
-J