Beautifully put. Do you read debunkingwhite? I do, and it's been very eye-opening.
It reminds me of a bit from one of Steven Brust's post-500 Years Later series; I can't remember which book, and I'm not sure what that series is called, but anyway. One character is talking about another character, and describes him as self-centered. She elaborates that he isn't selfish, but that he looks at any situation from the perspective of "What can I do?", rather than "What needs to be done?" Wheras the answer to the second question can sometimes be "Nothing," or as in your post "Shut up and listen," the answer to the first question moves attention away from the situation and towards the person asking the question.
So, yes. I've been doing a lot of listening and thinking lately. Sometimes, it's incredibly hard to just shut up and listen, and not immediately try to jump in with "Well, this one time, me me me..." It's hard to accept that some discussions aren't about me. And yes, I think that's a human thing; but it's also very much a white dominant-culture thing.
I've also found it extremely helpful to juxtapose discussions of race with discussions of gender. I'm wondering if it might be helpful to compare white folks talking about being oppressed in racial discussions with men talking about being oppressed in gender discussions. There's a valid point to such comments, but when the problem is so overwhelmingly one-sided, drawing attention to the priveledged group and away from the group that is having genuine problems is... at best, disingenious; at worst, a deliberate attempt to deny the weaker group of a genuine voice and perspective.
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Date: 2006-06-04 09:18 pm (UTC)It reminds me of a bit from one of Steven Brust's post-500 Years Later series; I can't remember which book, and I'm not sure what that series is called, but anyway. One character is talking about another character, and describes him as self-centered. She elaborates that he isn't selfish, but that he looks at any situation from the perspective of "What can I do?", rather than "What needs to be done?" Wheras the answer to the second question can sometimes be "Nothing," or as in your post "Shut up and listen," the answer to the first question moves attention away from the situation and towards the person asking the question.
So, yes. I've been doing a lot of listening and thinking lately. Sometimes, it's incredibly hard to just shut up and listen, and not immediately try to jump in with "Well, this one time, me me me..." It's hard to accept that some discussions aren't about me. And yes, I think that's a human thing; but it's also very much a white dominant-culture thing.
I've also found it extremely helpful to juxtapose discussions of race with discussions of gender. I'm wondering if it might be helpful to compare white folks talking about being oppressed in racial discussions with men talking about being oppressed in gender discussions. There's a valid point to such comments, but when the problem is so overwhelmingly one-sided, drawing attention to the priveledged group and away from the group that is having genuine problems is... at best, disingenious; at worst, a deliberate attempt to deny the weaker group of a genuine voice and perspective.
[/end flailing]