Eep!

[rivka]

I had no idea they publicized it.

I made overheads today for my defense. I had been planning to use Powerpoint, but John told me that (a) my presentation can only be fifteen minutes long at a maximum, and (b) he does not approve of students trying to be "flashy" with AV materials at their dissertation defenses. So I have a nice series of eight transparencies, very much all about substance over style.

I'm starting to get nervous.

I was thinking today... for years, my dissertation was my private bete noire, my solitary battle. I was ashamed of my lack of progress, so I resisted talking about it to anyone. It was very lonely. But in the last six weeks or so, as I've been pushing towards the finish line, more and more I've started to think of my dissertation as a rite of passage. I'm very conscious of my friends who have gone before me. When people say, "oh yeah, I felt like that too, just before the end," it's come to mean more to me than just sympathy - it reminds me that I'm traveling a path that generations of academics in all fields have traveled. There's something encouraging about it. I guess it's... context, for how hard all of this has been. I don't know. I've started and then deleted a bunch of attempts at explaining it here.

It's just... thanks, guys.

Comments

[therealjae.livejournal.com]

You're very welcome.

Oh, and the nervousness-cum-eagerness is normal, too. :-)

-J

[kightp.livejournal.com]

For the nerves, I recommend a mantra taught to me by a wonderful Wild Woman named Jule Wind, the night before she led me off on my first (and so far last) mountain climb:

It's OK to have butterflies. Just make them fly in formation.

Break a leg. (-;

[dandelion-diva.livejournal.com]

Sending lots and lots of good vibes to you. I know you'll do fabulously.:)

Gessi

[patgreene.livejournal.com]

Go rivka!

I'll be thinking of you next Wednesday.....

[dedoc.livejournal.com]

As you've noted by now, it is the custom --going back to the 1300s -- to publicize defenses. Fortunately, yours is belike to be much more sedate than medieval ones were prone to be...

You can do this. And there are no few of us pulling for you.

*hugs*

[eeyorerin]

After it's over, I will tell you the story of my father's dissertation defense, which is only amusing after one has gone through the defense process. (He keeps telling it to me in a "could be worse" way, and I keep telling him that it doesn't make me feel any better. However, he has been Ph.Ded for 23 years, so it did end well.)

I hope it goes smoothly and well, and that your supporters are there in droves, and that they don't take too long to "deliberate."

[anotheranon.livejournal.com]

Hang in there - you can do it!

[melebeth]

Not only do they publicize it, but your friends will...

a) come to listen
and
b) torment you for 3 years afterward over the really funny verbal slip you make halfway through. ("Imagine a spherical vagina...")

But despite all adversity, and there probably will be adversity, you know your topic better than anyone and will therefore come through with flying colors and dinner party stories that will keep people giggling for years.

You'll kick butt, hon. We have faith in you. :)

[fairoriana.livejournal.com]

Totally different scale, I know, but I'm a pretty good public speaker. The ONLY thing that impressed my honor's thesis advisor about the work I'd poured my heart, soul and senior year into was the fact that I could speak about it without using notes. DUH! I'd slept and breathed it for 6 months!

It was annoying.

[brian1789.livejournal.com]

Your reaction is typical... and I think you'll pass easily! Nerves are typical, as is the anticipation of a many-year effort come to completion.

But... only 15 minutes?

(I had to do 45 plus 45 for questions, the first 60 minutes public and the last 30 with just my committee, for reference. But it was in a different field...)

[rivka.livejournal.com]

The difference is largely a matter of audience, I bet. The only people expected to be at my defense are on my committee, so they will all have read my dissertation. At a public defense attended by the whole department, you have to present your work at length, because it's the only information much of the audience will get about your research.

In my department, even the full 15 minutes may not happen - we're told to expect to be interrupted with questions. My advisor told me that I shouldn't think that I can talk long enough to avoid the committee's questions. ;-)

[ororo.livejournal.com]

I vibrate with admiration and good luck wishes in your direction.

[lizardling.livejournal.com]

You go. :)

[starstraf.livejournal.com]

I'm reading late - you are probally already thru or during - so sending good lucks!

[flyfreeizzie.livejournal.com]

Yes, I know this is really old and really strange but whatever.

I havent kept up much with LJ but as I embark on graduate school decisions, I happen to notice your link to not only disability but also dissertation.. two relevent things in my life. I recently attended a friends dis. defense and a thesis one as well... it was.... stressful... just watching the final crime scene..

I am doing data analysis .. well trying too on my own study I did as a undergrad and will hopefully be something I pursue latter...

Anyways, I have to say that although I dont really know you, it makes me happy.... strange as that sounds that you are... a)a psychologist and b_ you have a disability because I so rarely see that. Im a member of the APA and they have this mentorship program .. that hasn't panned out!

So I enjoyed reading some of your past posts and think its great. I LOVE behavioral medicine. It's fascinating. I volunteer at the UCSD cancer center and my advisor is part of the SDSU/UCSD Joint doctoral program in clin. psych. Its waaaaaaaaaaay to research oriented for me but I still love the work they do.

Anyways.. random admiration...

Issadora