A rush of pure fury

[rivka]

First read this post.

I used to just be sad in the morning, and after 11am I was okay. But in the last two weeks that okay period has been pushed back to 2pm and then to 5pm and now I am not ever okay. My nights are just as bad as my mornings. There isn’t a moment in the day that I look forward to. I don’t see an end to this cycle of stress, and I find myself asking much too often, “Why go on?”

Yesterday I saw a psychiatrist who prescribed me a combination of drugs. I wish that there were other ways that I could go about getting better, but you have to believe me when I say that this is way beyond herbal remedies or dietary changes. I exercise all the time and I have a very healthy diet (except for the pop tarts, but people, a woman needs her pop tarts). This situation is life-threatening. I am afraid of hurting myself. [...]

But there is one terrible drawback to this step I am taking toward sanity. The doctor told me that I have to wean Leta if I want to work up to therapeutic levels of these drugs. I have to stop breastfeeding in the next month.

Then read this response.

Comments

[jmhm.livejournal.com]

I guess I never told you about the lactation consultant who came into my room twelve hours after my 36 hours of unmedicated labor when the nurses had not yet allowed me to hold my child (bless her, she refused to take any food from them, and once I had her I refused to give her back) and asked my about breastfeeding.

me: I'm going to try, but I don't know if I can, since I had breast reduction surgery.

her: Wow, I bet you could just kill yourself.

[jmhm.livejournal.com]

Oh, and my PC, who told me in the course of an exam that I was "a whale," tried to give me a twenty five year old 800-calorie diet for diabetics (severely restricted protein, lots of processed grains) and then told me that I had to see a psychiatrist if I wanted something for PPD because while it did exist, it was extremely rare and I was only pretending to have it to get drugs?