Dear neighbors:

If our houses are about fifteen feet apart, and they face each other at the back, and between my bedroom and the back of my house is a landing and my kid's room and a bathroom, and another neighbor's air conditioner is running, and it's 3:30 in the morning, and I can hear you having sex,

YOU ARE TOO DAMN LOUD.

Thank you.

Chaste hugs and kisses,
Rivka