Stopwatch.
Jul. 31st, 2004 01:47 pmTime elapsed from first positive pregnancy test to first pregnancy freakout: about 54 hours.
I went to the library this morning to look at books about pregnancy. I want to look at a few different approaches before I buy a book, so I got a whole stack off the shelf and paged through them for a while.
Gradually, I began feeling crushed by the weight of responsibility. I mean: this huge, monumental process by which a ball of undifferentiated cells becomes a live person is happening inside me, and I'm completely responsible for it. If I don't take in absolutely all the nutrients it needs, there's no other way for it to get them. If I do any one of a huge list of apparently innocuous things, it could hurt the baby. I'll have to make decisions about everything, some of which will probably matter a lot and some of which won't really matter, and it will be my responsibility to figure out which is which. I have to learn everything there is to find out about what's going on, and even then, there will be a lot of stuff I won't know.
I cried all over Michael, who calmed me down using the skillful application of sympathy and common sense. Sheesh. Is this hormonal, or what?
I went to the library this morning to look at books about pregnancy. I want to look at a few different approaches before I buy a book, so I got a whole stack off the shelf and paged through them for a while.
Gradually, I began feeling crushed by the weight of responsibility. I mean: this huge, monumental process by which a ball of undifferentiated cells becomes a live person is happening inside me, and I'm completely responsible for it. If I don't take in absolutely all the nutrients it needs, there's no other way for it to get them. If I do any one of a huge list of apparently innocuous things, it could hurt the baby. I'll have to make decisions about everything, some of which will probably matter a lot and some of which won't really matter, and it will be my responsibility to figure out which is which. I have to learn everything there is to find out about what's going on, and even then, there will be a lot of stuff I won't know.
I cried all over Michael, who calmed me down using the skillful application of sympathy and common sense. Sheesh. Is this hormonal, or what?
no subject
Date: 2004-09-01 06:27 pm (UTC)