First childbirth class.

[rivka]

Last night we started our six-week childbirth preparation course. There are four other couples in the class, all clients of our same midwives, all roughly our age, all city dwellers like us. (That's a particularly nice touch, given that around here many people treat the post-children move to the suburbs as a natural law, not a personal choice.) We meet in the instructor's cozy and relaxed open-plan kitchen/family room.

We were all given a binder full of handouts and a copy of Penny Simkin's Pregnancy, Childbirth, and the Newborn, which Michele (the instructor) says is the best book out there. I'm pleased, because I've recently discovered that my Dr. Sears pregnancy book is a little sparse in its discussion of birth itself, probably because there's also a Sears book exclusively devoted to birth. We can borrow from her vast library of other childbirth and parenting books for a $20 deposit. We're also rotating a copy of a video called The Happiest Baby on the Block, which has strategies for soothing a crying baby and has been highly recommended on misc.kids.pregnancy. This class is definitely going to feed my inner information junkie.

We began with a review/discussion of pregnancy restrictions and symptoms. She passed around a tote bag and had each person (men as well as women) pull out an item. She asked us why we thought our item was included, and we discussed the symptom or restriction in question. I drew a beer can, and said that women are advised not to drink at all during pregnancy but that, as far as I could tell, the research only indicated that daily drinking or binge drinking was harmful. (She agreed.) Michael drew a toothbrush, which mystified him because he doesn't actually watch me brush my teeth and so hadn't realized that bleeding gums are a routine pregnancy symptom. Most amusing item: a plastic crab. Michele said, "When men draw this, they're like, 'I don't know, is there a shellfish restriction?' And I'm thinking, 'Come on, you're just afraid to say it.' Women come right out and say, 'this is because I'm so crabby.'" New information to me: women who consume more omega-3 fatty acids have a lower risk of preterm labor and postpartum depression. I may start taking supplements.

We reviewed the anatomy of pregnancy and delivery, using a set of full-color charts and a plastic model of the pelvis. I was familiar with the basic outline, obviously, but hadn't looked much at visual aids (I've been more interested in visual depictions of fetal development), so this part was very helpful. It's one thing to know intellectually that you're having heartburn and shortness of breath because your organs are all squashed up by the baby, and another thing to actually see where the organs all are in a third-trimester torso.

Then it was time for a bathroom-snack-and-chatting break. Hard to tell, yet, if I'm going to be friends with any of these women.

After break, we talked about signs of preterm labor, the difference between a Braxton-Hicks contraction and a labor contraction, and what to do if we seem to be in preterm labor. (Surprisingly, the answer is not "panic.") We passed around a plastic model of cervixes at different stages of dilation. Then it was time for a video on stages of labor. She prepared us for its explicitness and warned us that just-being-born babies are not attractive, or even especially humanoid in appearance. And then we watched.

The video was... graphic. Lots of flinching and nervous giggles from the class. But it also had excellent animations showing what happens to the cervix, uterus, and baby during each stage of labor, which was the main reason why she had us watching it at the first class. And it was helpful to me to actually see women in different stages of labor, after having read about them. After the video we reviewed the stages orally, and then it was time to finish with a 10-minute progressive muscle relaxation exercise.

Mmm, progressive muscle relaxation.

Our homework: give each other a ten-minute massage with verbal feedback. This is apparently to encourage us to start communicating explicitly about what kinds of touch feel best.

I think it's going to be a great class. A lot of what we covered in the first meeting was review for me, because I've been reading about pregnancy and delivery, but I still feel as though I learned plenty of new things and developed a better understanding of the things I already knew. And I'm guessing that, from here on out, the ratio of new information to old will be much, much higher. Yay.

Comments

Omega-3 fatty acids

[therealjae.livejournal.com]

Flax seeds. A tablespoon (always ground in a coffee grinder) mixed into your breakfast cereal every morning. Then you don't need supplements. :-)

Also, remember how the concept of childbirth classes made me giggle? Well, childbirth classes with *homework* ...

-J

Re: Omega-3 fatty acids

[rivka.livejournal.com]

Also, remember how the concept of childbirth classes made me giggle? Well, childbirth classes with *homework* ...

"Okay, everyone, when you come back next week, I'll expect you to be three centimeters dilated..."

You're so juvenile. :-)

Re: Omega-3 fatty acids

[rosefox]

I was just going to recommend flaxseed oil, which has done me a lot of good on the anti-stress front and is also good for your skin (stretch marks!). Flax seeds are good too, especially if you need the fiber.

[papersky.livejournal.com]

When I went to one, in the ten minute bathroom break, all the other potential mothers started to smoke in the bathroom, so there wasn't any doubt as to whether I was going to be friends with them.

Also, I shut my eyes in the video.

[rivka.livejournal.com]

I guess I'm showing my biases here, but I would've imagined that the kind of woman who smoked during pregnancy would also be the kind of woman who didn't take childbirth classes.

My sister took a hospital-based class, and it was full of pregnant teenaged girls, accopmanied by their mothers. Not a big source of friendships for her, either.

I shut my eyes in the video.

I was dutifully watching right until we got up close and personal with the placenta. I know it's a miraculous organ, and everything, but ew.

We learned a useful new phrase last night: "North Pole fathers." These are fathers who stay up by the mother's head all through delivery, never taking a peek between her legs. I liked that the instructor went on to say, "If that's what works for the two of you, there's nothing wrong with that at all - don't get caught up in what your peers tell you that you should do."

I have strong suspicions that Michael will be a North Pole father, and that's totally okay with me. But he did watch the video. I don't know if he kept his eyes open the whole time.

[wiredferret.livejournal.com]

sil wasn't terribly thrilled about the very messy bits, and he refused point-blank to cut anyone's umbilical cords or help with the delivery. That's okay with me. At least it is now.

I think the weirdest part of childbirth for me was the temporary insanity/trauma amnesia. It works out nicely, because at least for Kay's birth, I don't remember swearing at the top of my lungs. Sil said he didn't know I knew those words.

Heh. Oops.

Also, placenta is icky. Cool, but icky.

[wild-irises.livejournal.com]

I have a very close friend (with three adult or near-adult children) who likes pregnancy, loves labor (yes, really), and ate at least one of her placentae. She can shock a roomful of men who consider themselves unsquickable into complete silence by telling this story. I don't think I could do it myself.

[patgreene.livejournal.com]

We learned a useful new phrase last night: "North Pole fathers." These are fathers who stay up by the mother's head all through delivery, never taking a peek between her legs.

Then there are the fathers who sneak peeks over the drape during the C-section (and want to take pictures) because "wow, that's so cool looking."

[hobbitbabe.livejournal.com]

Neat! I always enjoy the anecdote of my friend Kevin's description of the other people at their first class.

"We were all white people in our 30s, and because we had to go to the suburb to take this class I was feeling sort of urban superior and was looking for other outsiders to identify with. So this couple in their very early 20s came in, and I went to talk to them. Then this inter-racial couple came in, and I thought aha, I will welcome them before anyone else does. Then at the last minute Karen and Nancy walked in, and I went to say hi because it was so good to see someone we knew and I didn't know that Karen was pregnant, and I realized that anyone watching me would be thinking it was just another way of showing how liberal I was."

[rivka.livejournal.com]

Hee! I can totally see myself in that anecdote.

[wiredferret.livejournal.com]

Wow. That class sounds fabulous. Ours was solid, but not mind-blowing. The things that stick with me were the sheet with circles representing 10 cm, one of the graphics, and the list of things you should panic about.

FYI, the thing that gave me the most false contractions/early labor symptoms was dehydration. It is HARD to be sufficiently hydrated.

[tammylc.livejournal.com]

Yep - my understanding is that deyhdration is the number one cause of premature labor.

I was told to aim for a gallon of water a day when I was pregnant, and it was really hard to do. Now that I'm nursing, I drink at least a gallon a day without even thinking about it!

[rivka.livejournal.com]

the sheet with circles representing 10 cm

10cm is HUGE! I mean, I've felt my cervix. There's no room for it to be 10cm wide.

(Yes, yes, I know.)

With reference to cervical dilation, our instructor said, "We use sports metaphors and food metaphors in this class. The cervix lends itself to food metaphors. 1cm is about the size of a Cheerio, and you move up through banana slice... and apple slice... and 10cm is the size of a good New York bagel." I'm now picturing our midwife saying, "Okay, Rebecca, you're bagel-sized. You can go ahead and push."

[geekchick]

My first reaction to seeing the 10 cm illustration on the plastic card in my doctor's office was "You have GOT to be kidding me." Yeah, I know, but still. Yikes!

[minnaleigh.livejournal.com]

That sounds like a great class! How helpful!

[zencuppa.livejournal.com]

Wow, that sounds like a great class. I couldn't manage to look at anything about actual childbirth until I was about 6-7 months pregnant, it scared me too much.

That being said, I found that doing Lamaze breathing every night did wonders for my delivery . ..

Kudos to you and your partner for taking this course :-)

[rivka.livejournal.com]

I couldn't manage to look at anything about actual childbirth until I was about 6-7 months pregnant, it scared me too much.

When I was six weeks pregnant, my sister lent me a book called Giving birth: What it really feels like. I thanked her and then put it far, far away. I also didn't follow the advice my pregnancy book's advice to read the book cover-to-cover early in pregnancy. I could deal with information about the first trimester, and a little bit of information about the second trimester, and that was it.

Around 5 1/2 months, I started being interested in reading about labor and delivery, but it was still too early to get into many actual details about parenting, or buying baby supplies. Now I'm finally ready to do serious thinking about parenting an infant.

Hope you're feeling better.

[therealjae.livejournal.com]

I've seen a video of childbirth (a friend's, of her third child's), and just thought it was cool. I suppose it helped to think that I wouldn't have to actually go through it, though.

-J

[hobbitbabe.livejournal.com]

We saw a childbirth video in Grade 11 health class. My classmates seemed to have consensus that childbirth was gross and they were never doing it. I thought it was cool and that I'd like to do it someday. Course they mostly have kids now, and I acquired mine by a more unusual and less messy process ;-) They also thought that the grossest thing about the movie was that the dad had a hairy beard and the mum had hairy armpits.

[geminigirl]

Funny...the movie we saw, I remember everyone being grossed out because feces came out of the Mom's rear end during the pushing phase.

[boxofdelights]

We got to see a childbirth video in grade 2&3 (seven and eight years old) because one of my classmates had an obstetrician father, and he and I guess our teachers thought it would be cool.

I don't remember how the boys reacted, but most of the girls were shattered.

[rivka.livejournal.com]

I suppose it helped to think that I wouldn't have to actually go through it, though.

I think that, a couple of years ago, I would've just thought a birth video was cool. Now, it's not just knowing that I have to go through it, it's knowing that I have to go through it three months from now or less.

I do still feel very positive about the idea of labor and delivery - don't get me wrong. But I definitely had an "oh shit" reaction to my first sight of a crowning baby. (That's when the widest part of the head is passing through the vaginal opening. Um. Gosh. Who, me?)

[patgreene.livejournal.com]

The great thing about being the mom is that you don't have to look at what is going on down there unless you want to have the nurse position a mirror so you can see. (I didn't. I still have yet to *see* childbirth -- I closed my eyes during the video too.) Or was it the "Ouch, that looks painful" reaction?

[tammylc.livejournal.com]

I too found that I could only think/read about one trimester ahead.

[brian1789.livejournal.com]

Sleep deprivation, and suddenly treasuring two hours to yourself... burping techniques and cuddly noises. Thank goodness for on-the-job-training. And make sure there's support and distractions around 6-8 weeks postpartum (typical depression trough).

Were you guys learning Lamaze breathing techniques? ("pant, pant, bllooww...")

[rivka.livejournal.com]

Were you guys learning Lamaze breathing techniques? ("pant, pant, bllooww...")

It's an eclectic class, not a Lamaze method class - I think the idea is that we're supposed to develop a repertoire of strategies that work for our particular coping style. We might learn Lamaze breathing patterns later on, I don't know - what we did last night was more "deep relaxation" breathing.

[tammylc.livejournal.com]

Are you going to do any work with ice? It's something we did a lot of in our Birthing from Within class. We'd learn some different breathing/focus techniques, then practice them while holding a piece of ice for 30 seconds. While obviously not equivalent to the pain of labor, it does give one a very intense sensation to work around.

Obviously I can't speak to how well the technique translated to labor, not having had any, but I was able to use the skills learned in calming and centering myself for my c/s.

[rivka.livejournal.com]

Are you going to do any work with ice? It's something we did a lot of in our Birthing from Within class. We'd learn some different breathing/focus techniques, then practice them while holding a piece of ice for 30 seconds.

Wow, that's an excellent idea. I don't know if we're going to do it in class, but I will definitely try it at home. Thank you.

[tammylc.livejournal.com]

Welcome. (Although I suspect you won't be thanking me later - damn, holding ice for 30 seconds can hurt!)

And the best thing - you can make Michael do it with you. Just so he'll have *some* idea, y'know.

[jinian.livejournal.com]

I'm familiar with a slight variation on that: plunging both hands into a tub of iced (I think not salt, at least) water for simulated contractions. It's more intense than holding one piece of ice, since with a piece there's more non-touching hand area than touching. Brr. Very distracting.

[tammylc.livejournal.com]

We started with just the holding. People who didn't find that sufficiently intense got to put their whole hands into ice water. Cubes were plenty for me, though.

[ailbhe]

So what's the difference between b-h and real?

I love the idea of homework. That would have been really really useful to us.

Rob had a look at her being born, but sat beside my upper body and never let go of my hand. I was surprised to hear he could see much but apparently he could.

Breath control helps a lot.

A lot of the woman at my antenatal classes were smokers, too, though none smoked at the class - they were at least embarrassed by it. The classes were free, which helped, I suppose.

A.

[rivka.livejournal.com]

So what's the difference between b-h and real?

Biologically, the difference is that B-H contractions don't cause dilation and effacement of the cervix. Experientially, according to our instructor, B-H contractions tend to either be painless (earlier in pregnancy) or hurt only in the front of the abdomen (closer to delivery), and early labor contractions hurt all the way around to the lower back.

But she said that the biggest difference is that B-H contractions go away, or become less frequent, if you drink water, lie down, change position, etc., and they don't follow a steady, rhythmic pattern. Labor contractions don't go away, and they follow a steady pattern.

I love the idea of homework. That would have been really really useful to us.

Everything I've read says that labor preparation is more effective if you practice at home, but it's kind of hard to know how to organize or arrange that. Homework is a good way to make sure that we actually do get in the habit of applying skills outside of class.

The classes were free, which helped, I suppose.

This course is $125 for the six-week course, including materials (like the book, which we get to keep). I think that's very reasonable.

[ailbhe]

I'm still not clear on the b-h vs real, since I effaced alright but didn't dilate, and there was no difference in the kind of contraction over the course of just over a month... Perhaps I'll never find out. Certainly my own midwife and obstetrician can only come up with "We don't know what happened. It was very strange."

That's a very reasonable course charge - but I really meant that Poor People are more likely to smoke, and more likely to attend a free class than one you have to pay for no matter how little. I'm guessing the rest, but the "Poor people are more likely to smoke" bit is true.

[elusis.livejournal.com]

FYI, infojunkie, gordonzola posted a very interesting discussion of the whole "cheese/pregnancy" debate here (http://www.livejournal.com/users/gordonzola/177964.html), with preliminary discussion here (http://www.livejournal.com/users/gordonzola/177885.html).

[pecunium.livejournal.com]

I want to thank you for sharing.

Even with two siblings (and a stint as an au pair) I've never had to deal with being the other half of a pregnancy, so the information is nice (since sooner, or later, Maia and I are planning on a couple of kids).

I was in the delivery room for those siblings, and it was interesting to see how my mother handled it. SHe his transition and started to scream like a banshee (she had, it seems, forgotten what it was like, as well as having been drugged for the first two).

My stepfather almost panicked. I spent time calming him, while he dealth with her.

Yes, new babies look like lizards, the handsome ones look like Churchill. No, you won't care a bit.

Re the commenton flax-seed as a supplement. The oil goes rancid in the flicker of a wing, so get seed.

To get seed, at a reasonable price, go to a feed store. A 25 pound sack (which ought to be more than enough, for quite some time) shouldn't be more than 10-15 dollars.

Just for the fun of it, you can plant some (which isn't practical at health food prices) and get some lovely plants... tall and spiky looking, with soft leaves and beautiful blue flowers.

TK

[pecunium.livejournal.com]

Oh yeah, the placenta issue... it has a a whole lot more grue when it's a horse (let me tell you, breeding animals makes one much less squicky about people's reproduction).

And if you want some real gross-out material to take to class, just ask... I have some (not horrific, just yucky) stories to share.

TK

[rivka.livejournal.com]

Even with two siblings (and a stint as an au pair) I've never had to deal with being the other half of a pregnancy, so the information is nice (since sooner, or later, Maia and I are planning on a couple of kids).

Yay! I bet you'll be a great father.

I see, looking back, that I've left out a bunch of things she said that were specifically directed at the men in the class. Most notably, she said that they should start thinking now about what it would be like for them, emotionally, to see their partners in severe pain.

I like that she seems to recognize that labor and delivery are stressful for men, as well as women.

My stepfather almost panicked. I spent time calming him, while he dealth with her.

saoba is going to be our labor coach. One of the things that makes that great is that she has a relationship with Michael, and will be able to help him if things get difficult.

[journeywoman.livejournal.com]

The Simkin book is great. Unlike certain other books, it presents factual information without too much author bias showing through. Focuses mostly on birth and coping techniques; spotty on pregnancy and newborn issues, but there are other books for that. May I recommend The Baby Owner's Manual?

There are Simkin videos out there as well that I thought were quite good. Perhaps you'll get those later in the course.

Of course, all the coping techniques went out the window during my five really difficult contractions. Michael kept having to remind me simply to breathe. Breathing patterns were a wee bit beyond my ability at that point.

Karp's video is pretty good, though I admit the techniques haven't worked too well on our babe to date. But he's not very fussy like the babies in the video--most of his crying is hunger-related. He's got a toddler DVD too, which I have but haven't watched yet.

Have fun in the class!

[rivka.livejournal.com]

Focuses mostly on birth and coping techniques; spotty on pregnancy and newborn issues, but there are other books for that.

Which is exactly what we need, because we've got the Sears books for pregnancy and infancy. It's good to get another recommendation, thanks!

There are Simkin videos out there as well that I thought were quite good. Perhaps you'll get those later in the course.

Probably so, because our instructor seems to think the world of Simkin. We watch a video every week, apparently.

[kalmn.livejournal.com]

one thing the baby owner's manual that is left out that is crucial?

do not open! no user serviceable parts inside!

(but it's a great book.)

[curiousangel.livejournal.com]

I'm guessing opening the baby up will void the warranty. :)

[metacara.livejournal.com]

That Baby Owner's manual was a godsend for us because when you're panicked over green runny poop or inexplicable fussing, I had no tolerance for flipping through pages of prose advice; I wanted to know how to FIX IT NOW. It's a silly book but a worthwhile one. I found that the more prosy books were fascinating pre-delivery but annoying after delivery. Love your journal, btw!

[rivka.livejournal.com]

Thanks! How did you find me?

[metacara.livejournal.com]

I can't remember, isn't that weird? I have been reading your LJ for a while, and I think that I might have just found you on a search of "parenting" as an interest, which is embarassing to admit, like I am trolling the parenting sites for hot chicks. Sorry, I feel like a stalker. Anyway, I really love your journal for both the pregnancy stuff (totally fascinating to me) and the commentary on other issues. You're great!