(no subject)
Jul. 11th, 2005 06:33 pmToday was the first day after the end of my maternity leave. I went in for a couple of days a few weeks ago, but this was the first day of my new working arrangement: in the office on Mondays and Tuesdays while Alex stays home with the sitter, home Wednesdays, in the office on Thursdays while Michael stays home with Alex, and home Fridays. Today was the first day of the new normal.
I was pushed directly into the deep end, at work, because one of my RAs was out sick. (She called me last night saying she'd been sick in bed all day but would definitely definitely come in the next day, and I reminded her that she'd be doing no favors to our immunocompromised subject population if she did.) So I spent the afternoon collecting the data she would have: two subjects for our adherence study and one for our coping study, and a client for the treatment study who didn't actually fit the inclusion criteria but whom, given that someone else had enrolled her, I did not want to send away without treatment. I found myself feeling simultaneously rusty (how do we explain the coping study during the consent process?) and irritated by the things that weren't being done as well as I would do them (how did this woman get enrolled in the treatment study?). I'm kind of dreading the lab meeting tomorrow morning, where we'll hash out exactly where things have gone astray and I will most likely be asked to develop a dozen new policies.
The part of returning to work that I turned out to be emotionally unprepared for is the second shift. I guess it's ingrained in me that work is followed by the after-work period of rest, recuperation, and web browsing. Now, of course, work is followed by switching to my other job of hands-on mother. Michael had to make that transition months ago, back when I was immersed in motherhood as a full-time job. Being a stay-at-home mom wasn't easier than being at work, but the rhythms are different. You can pace yourself for the longer 24-hour workday when you're home all day. Alex's morning nap, for example, was a peaceful oasis of me-time that fortified me for the demands of the afternoon. Coming home to a fussy or hungry baby after four straight hours running subjects just isn't the same thing.
Don't get me wrong; I was delighted to see her. It felt good to hold her and smell her and let her graw on my knuckle. (Could she really be teething already?) It's just another adjustment to make from my pre-Alex life to my post-Alex life.
In other news, we've rearranged our living room to be much more open. The house is only fifteen feet wide to begin with, and between the couch, the coffee table, the baby accoutrements, and the media unit, the living room had pretty much narrowed to passage width. We took out the coffee table, relocated some of the baby accoutrements, and put down a big soft rug. I love it. It feels so much more spacious.

Here's a closeup of the pattern on the new rug:

I was pushed directly into the deep end, at work, because one of my RAs was out sick. (She called me last night saying she'd been sick in bed all day but would definitely definitely come in the next day, and I reminded her that she'd be doing no favors to our immunocompromised subject population if she did.) So I spent the afternoon collecting the data she would have: two subjects for our adherence study and one for our coping study, and a client for the treatment study who didn't actually fit the inclusion criteria but whom, given that someone else had enrolled her, I did not want to send away without treatment. I found myself feeling simultaneously rusty (how do we explain the coping study during the consent process?) and irritated by the things that weren't being done as well as I would do them (how did this woman get enrolled in the treatment study?). I'm kind of dreading the lab meeting tomorrow morning, where we'll hash out exactly where things have gone astray and I will most likely be asked to develop a dozen new policies.
The part of returning to work that I turned out to be emotionally unprepared for is the second shift. I guess it's ingrained in me that work is followed by the after-work period of rest, recuperation, and web browsing. Now, of course, work is followed by switching to my other job of hands-on mother. Michael had to make that transition months ago, back when I was immersed in motherhood as a full-time job. Being a stay-at-home mom wasn't easier than being at work, but the rhythms are different. You can pace yourself for the longer 24-hour workday when you're home all day. Alex's morning nap, for example, was a peaceful oasis of me-time that fortified me for the demands of the afternoon. Coming home to a fussy or hungry baby after four straight hours running subjects just isn't the same thing.
Don't get me wrong; I was delighted to see her. It felt good to hold her and smell her and let her graw on my knuckle. (Could she really be teething already?) It's just another adjustment to make from my pre-Alex life to my post-Alex life.
In other news, we've rearranged our living room to be much more open. The house is only fifteen feet wide to begin with, and between the couch, the coffee table, the baby accoutrements, and the media unit, the living room had pretty much narrowed to passage width. We took out the coffee table, relocated some of the baby accoutrements, and put down a big soft rug. I love it. It feels so much more spacious.

Here's a closeup of the pattern on the new rug:

no subject
Date: 2005-07-11 11:13 pm (UTC)That second shift stuff is profound. Much to ponder there.
no subject
Date: 2005-07-11 11:40 pm (UTC)I have, however, gradually replaced my seating with Mission-style futons (http://www.atbd.com/individualbeds/Futonpages/MissionOak.html) with nice, wide wooden arms so there's a place to set drinks. (-:
no subject
Date: 2005-07-14 03:11 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-07-11 11:42 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-07-12 02:07 pm (UTC)Unfortunately, within a week or so, she started doing the wacky baby locomotion thing of pushing with her feet so she's going head-first, and that just made everything strange. She did actually creep off our bed once before she could really crawl.
Nothing else matters but sleep.
The rug look svery familiar, though. I have one in that similar pattern with darker colors -- dark blue, rich burgundy, dark green and a couple other colors. It's in the girl's room. Look, Squeaky! Squares! FIND A GREEN SQUARE!
:^)
no subject
Date: 2005-07-16 05:50 pm (UTC)-J