How to come out.

[rivka]

Our church just hired a new Director of Religious Education. Here's an excerpt from her introductory column in the monthly newsletter, with emphasis added by me:

[...] And change is what we have before us. For me: a new apartment, a new job, a new routine, and a new ocean to visit when time allows. For all of us: new adventures, new forms to fill out, new committee responsibilities, new ideas to imagine, and new friends to enrich our lives. It might be too much if it weren't for all the familiar comforts that help us meet new challenges. For me, that's my family: my two partners, Lyn and Uri, and our cats, Lucy and Splat. And, of course, Unitarian Universalism, a faith that welcomes us all into a thoughtful reverence for this sacred world while nurturing within us the fierce desire for building justice.

I will be working with the Children's Religious Education Committee, building on the work of previous years, to continue to create a safe, welcoming religious home for children and youth. [...]

I've already met her, and I thought she was really cool. And I've heard fabulous things about her from the RE Committee. But this? I did not expect. Whoa.

Comments

[redbird]

Cool.

[therealjae.livejournal.com]

Wow! That's wonderful!

Are you going to send her a note? She may be getting some flak from this (given the incredibly controversial discussion I once participated in on soc.religion.unitarian-univ, it wouldn't surprise me at all), and it might be nice for her to hear an encouraging voice.

And now I'm wondering whether Uri is a man or a woman.

-J

[rivka.livejournal.com]

Yes, we've been e-mailing back and forth about the curricula for my RE class, and I think it'll be important to add some kind of friendly acknowledgement to my next note.

I'm trying to decide between "So, I see that you're polyamorous..." and a simple "We'd like to have you and your partners over for dinner."

[ricevermicelli.livejournal.com]

I'd go with option B. "So, I see that you're polyamorous..." is the kind of thing that makes me, at least, expect to hear a load of stupid questions. Have dinner with her before you ask those.

[timill]

"My partners and I would like to invite you and your partners..."

[therealjae.livejournal.com]

rivka's other partner might have a ways to travel, unfortunately. Though I'm sure it would be lovely. :-)

-J

[pir-anha.livejournal.com]

that really is way cool.

i'd go with option B. you can then bring up any other partners of yours during dinner. though i used option A to make an offer of friendship to the *poing*, *snicker*, but dinner wasn't an option, being as we live so far apart.

also, a cat named "splat"! these people must rock. :)

[brooksmoses]

Heh. The only Uri I've known was a man, so I assumed that was the case here, but Lyn to me is ambiguous -- my dad went by Lyn as a kid (his middle name was Lynwood).

[glinda-w.livejournal.com]

wow.

just... wow.

[melebeth]

Wow.

And also, Splat is an awesome name for a cat. Which just makes her cooler.

[nex0s.livejournal.com]

AWESOME!

n.

[hobbitbabe.livejournal.com]

Completely cool. I should add that to my list of good news for today.

[chargirlgenius.livejournal.com]

That's so cool. Mostly, it's cool that you go to a church where she identify herself in a newsletter.

[lietya.livejournal.com]

Oooh, how wonderful! I'm impressed by your church.

[llnaughty.livejournal.com]

i just (well, not "just", i guess "also") think the tags on this post is great: polyamory, queer, and religion! three mints in one!

[ricevermicelli.livejournal.com]

I don't which I think is cooler - the awesome, (apparantly) nonchalant way in which she came out, or the fact that she has a kitty named Splat.

[cheesepuppet.livejournal.com]

That's great! Where is this church? I hope it's in Seattle, because when we move back I'm desperately hoping to find an open-minded church.

[cheesepuppet.livejournal.com]

*laugh*

I just read your location. Sadly, not Seattle.

[tea-dragon.livejournal.com]

The one I go to is a United Methodist "Reconciling" congregation,(which means that lesbian and gay couples are welcome), in Seattle, but I honestly have no idea how folks would react to polyamory- a lot of them are older and may not have even heard of it. I could ask :) Which part of Seattle are you going to be in? It's called Trinity United Methodist. http://www.tumseattle.org/ It's smallish, has a family feel about it, a pastor who is a pacifist and can't stand Bush, and is social justice oriented. The church rents out space to non-profits, including a co-op preschool, an environmental group, and a guitar group.

But Seattle's pretty open-minded in general, so there's probably a UU church here somewhere too- I found my church by looking on the web. Happy church hunting!

[cheesepuppet.livejournal.com]

We won't be there for another few years, so I have time to do my research. :)

Right now we live in Ellensburg, and we actually have a reconciling methodist church here! I'll have to check it out again - the first time I went it was practically empty.

[roadnotes.livejournal.com]

Seriously cool.

[carandol.livejournal.com]

Nice. I do like the Unitarians. I'm not religious these days, but was brought up in the church. When I was going to Sunday school in the 1960s, we had a woman minister (unheard of!) also had a doctorate in Ecology (unheard of!). When one of the congregation became old and ill, and needed looking after at home, she married him so that she could go and live with him without it being a scandal.

Thankfully, things are more open these days. I think the main thing I learned from the Unitarians is tolerance.

which one?

[tendyl.livejournal.com]

Which church do you attend here in Baltimore? I so need to attend and see if I like it...

Re: which one?

[rivka.livejournal.com]

First Unitarian Church of Baltimore (http://www.firstunitarian.net/). They're in summer services now - the first regular-year service is September 10.

I'm teaching RE, so much of the time I won't be in the regular service, but let me know when you'd like to come down and we can arrange to meet up.

[dafna]

That is so cool. And I completely agree with everyone else who said Splat is the best cat name ever.

[baratron.livejournal.com]

Cool :) I *heart* your UU-ness so much.

[tea-dragon.livejournal.com]

What a welcoming church! Sounds wonderful.

Wow

[(Anonymous)]

What a fantastic new look! How amazing when an old bookmark opens a completely new site! I'm a little weirded out by the account of your church. I don't know if we have UU in Australia, but they certainly don't have a media profile. I go to an Anglican church once a week, but it's only to sing in the choir as I'm not a believer at all. They don't seem to mind.
cheers
Emma

Re: Wow

[rivka.livejournal.com]

Thanks! I am totally thrilled with the new look too, although my friends page doesn't look quite the way I want it yet.

Why "weirded out," if you don't mind my asking?

Re: Wow

[(Anonymous)]

Just a complete cognitive dissonance with anything in the mental category 'religion', given all that I've read about what your church thinks, does and is. Not that I'm knowledgeable on the subject, being a second generation atheist. The groups, cultures and ideas that go by the title 'religion' in my general vicinity, would, I'm sure, find your church about as devilish as they would find me, if they noticed me. And yet, I spent this afternoon singing religious texts in Latin, practising Mozart's Requiem in an Anglican church, for a concert next Saturday in another Anglican church, a benefit for an Arab hospital in Gaza. Contradiction can be a most productive thing.
Emma

Re: Wow

[rivka.livejournal.com]

Okay, sounds like good weirded out, then.

Although it is true that Christians have all the good music. I envy you the Requiem. For one reason or another, I've missed every opportunity I've had to perform that with a choir.