Clothes purge.

[rivka]

The corner of our bedroom has been an out-of-control pile of laundry for a long time. We have laundry bins there for whites, colors, and linens; those are well-maintained and regularly emptied. Our problem was the fourth bin, originally designed for clothes needing special treatment (such as dry cleaning). Eventually it overflowed to take over the whole corner with a huge and jumbled mishmash of dry cleaning, mending, outgrown things, hopelessly stained things, and random regular clothes which landed there after falling out of a laundry basket or getting kicked out of the way or something.

Last Friday, Michael saw a mouse. That provided immediate incentive to get our damn clothes off the damn floor, so this weekend we tackled the whole pile. We packed up the clothes into organized bundles of dry cleaning, Goodwill donations, rags, and trash.

I then decided to tackle my closet. I pulled out all the clothes that I rarely wear and tried them on. If something didn't fit or I didn't like it, I put it in the Goodwill pile. And the Goodwill pile got huge.

What struck me, as the rejected clothes piled higher and higher, was the number of things in my closet that I had never liked. I wore them, not because they looked good on me or because I thought they were pretty, but because they were my clothes. The biggest offender in this category: Empire-waisted dresses. I have big breasts and a short torso and a belly, and Empire waists are possibly the least flattering clothing style possible for my body type. I put, like, four of them into the Goodwill pile. Halfway through pulling one of them over my head to try it on, I stopped and realized, "You've never liked this dress. Why would you care whether it fits?" I had no answer.

Why did I wear so many clothes that I thought were ugly? Because I hate shopping, and I didn't look beyond the basics of "what respectable, not-too-expensive clothes do Lands End and Eddie Bauer have, that I could wear to work?", and I didn't return frumpy things that my mother bought me. Because I just bought the first affordable thing I saw when I shopped, instead of stopping to consider questions like "Would another style be more flattering?" or "Shouldn't you look further and find one that isn't acrylic?" Because they were clothes. Because I didn't want to look at myself too closely. Because I didn't really think I could look any better than I did. Because I didn't think it mattered if I hated the way I looked. Because I was on crutches and in chronic pain and shopping was the last thing I wanted to spend time and energy on. Because, in short, of a variety of things that don't make much sense in retrospect.

I haven't worn those things for a long time, but I didn't throw them out. They just hung out there in the back of the closet. It turns out that crushed in with the stuff I didn't really like were a few pieces that I do like, and totally forgot about because I couldn't find them. Like a couple of long-sleeved tailored blouses, one in deep royal blue and one in dark red. I had pretty much written off button-down shirts because they never look right on my chest, but these two fit great and look great. Huh.

I'd like to pare down even more. I'd like to get rid of everything I have that doesn't look good on me or make me feel good, even if it means that I have to do laundry a lot more often for a while. Because, really, wouldn't it be better to have five outfits that really work for me rather than twenty outfits that make me feel blah?

Comments

[geekymary.livejournal.com]

I did that recently. It's a nice process - feels good.

I remember Laura Bennet (from Project Runway - she's an architect, fashion designer and mother of 5 boys) saying she only has about 5 or 6 outfits in her closet total. Only things that look great on her and that she loved to wear. She didn't care if people saw her in the same outfit over and over. She argued that most people didn't even notice or care.

Of course, I keep buying clothes because I like to, but that's a different story.

[kcobweb.livejournal.com]

When we moved from Billings, I had my sister help me clean out my closet. She told me which things I had to get rid of (one actual quote was "that dress makes you look like a kindergarten teacher.... from 1985."). She could be brutal *and* honest. At the end, I had something like 7 bags of clothes that I donated to Goodwill (some of those were galagan's). And frankly, there were a few things I kept that she wanted me to get rid of. But that process was so incredibly freeing.....

I have a good friend (who lives in DC!) who likes to be personal shopper for people - she takes them out to the store and tells them what would look good on them. I really want her to provide this service for me some time.

[electricland.livejournal.com]

I'd like to pare down even more. I'd like to get rid of everything I have that doesn't look good on me or make me feel good, even if it means that I have to do laundry a lot more often for a while. Because, really, wouldn't it be better to have five outfits that really work for me rather than twenty outfits that make me feel blah?

Amen!

The thing about having clothes you never really liked, or that you kind of like but that don't actually look good on you, or that don't fit and never have, or that you bought because they were a good deal and they would probably be OK, or you needed something RIGHT NOW because nothing was clean, or you were in a weird mood that day at the store, or someone gave them to you and you couldn't be bothered to exchange them, or they were hand-me-downs from someone you love, is that they hang in your closet like perpetual reminders of failure. They make you feel bad. They are taking up physical and psychic space you could be using for other and better things. I am all for the ruthless approach to these clothes. That way you can see the clothes you actually do like!

[anotheranon.livejournal.com]

Because, really, wouldn't it be better to have five outfits that really work for me rather than twenty outfits that make me feel blah?

Yes, a thousand times yes! If you hate it and/or aren't wearing it, it's wasting closet space and not worth having.

[jenett]

I'm so with you on this.

Have you also learned the hanger trick? Hang everything in your closet with the hanger pointed one way (it's easier if this is the reverse of whatever you'd normally do.) Each time you wear a garment, reverse the hanger.

After a period of time - 6 months will get most seasonal variations, 3 months might or might not - look at your closet. Anything with the hanger the original direction needs seriously reconsideration.

I'm more and more on the "clothes I really like" not so much as a style thing, but as a just plain wanting to wear things that I like. (For style, I consult with friends, and get them to make suggestions. Hence more lower-cut-than-a-turtleneck tops in my winter wardrobe these days.)

The hanger trick

[ailbhe]

This is genius. I will go and do this soon.

I've been getting rid of clothes I felt I ought to keep for a while now. It makes me much better dressed and more comfortable.

[irismoonlight.livejournal.com]

Singing my song, you are. I come from a long line of clothes hoarders. saoba finally got me into clothes that fit. So I started tossing (or at least boxing up if I couldn't bear to part with them) clothes that didn't fit.

And somewhere in that process it hit me that there were clothes I didn't like because they made me feel 'less.' They reminded me of a bad section of my life, for example. Or made me feel dumpy. Or edgy somehow. Or reminded me that I'd wasted money. So I tossed them or gave them away. I wouldn't tolerate a person in my life who constantly berated me and reminded me of mistakes and bad times...why should I tolerate clothes *or other belongings* that trigger me to do the same to myself?

And I kept a few things that didn't fit because they were comforting. They made me feel GOOD. And I figure that's okay too.

Now if I can just part with all of mom's shoes...

[janetmiles.livejournal.com]

Now if I can just part with all of mom's shoes...

I just parted with four big boxes of my mom's cookbooks: I took them with me when I went to visit friends who cook a lot, and let them take what they wanted first. Then we took what was left to a weekend gathering, and let more people take what they wanted.

The last remaining box may go to the used book store, or else to Goodwill.

[lcohen]

i got a box together to get rid of this weekend, too.

my problem is that i have six closets and i change sizes a lot. so i have "hanging onto clothes that you are not currently wearing" reinforced. but i want to identify things that i wouldn't wear even if i was that size again or that i wore when i was that size because i felt like i didn't have the money to get stuff i actually liked. and i really want to get rid of stuff that fits me now but i still don't wear it. i have plenty of room but just because i have room for it doesn't mean i have to keep it.

congratulations on getting rid of so much stuff--and on finding some stuff you really like in the process!

[nellorat.livejournal.com]

As the years pass, I have kept fewer and fewer clothes for when I am again that size. The fact is, even when I end up about the same size, it seems that(as my mother would say) my cargo has shifted during the gains and losses, and different styles will probably look better on me anyway. Exceptions: very expensive; a pattern of fabric I adore and may not be able to replace; unconstructed items that fit any shape.

[ratphooey.livejournal.com]

I love the idea of having a uniform - a basic wardrobe of things that are comfortable, fit well, and look good. Multiples of the same thing, maybe in different colors. Think how easy getting dressed would be, and how much space there'd be in your closet! For other clutter, though, I suppose.

[telerib.livejournal.com]

I have started this. I hate "needing" to buy and store all basic accessories (shoes, belts, purses; gloves, scarves, hats) in black and brown. It's vaguely scary, but I'm trying to go all-brown (or goes-with-brown). I haven't bought new pants in black in a few years now (except for maternity wear, when the color selections were limited). All shirts and jackets must go with brown pants.

I've been loving it. Sometimes, I get a little wishful for the sheer expressive variety of, say, my sister's closet, but when I'm stumbling through the morning at 5am, the simpler closet is a big help. Plus, I don't have my sister's fashion sense - it's only in the past 3-4 years that I've started to learn about how necklines, seams and details can flatter or dumpify me. (And also, how to wear makeup... what can I say? Engineer.)

[zingerella.livejournal.com]

Because, really, wouldn't it be better to have five outfits that really work for me rather than twenty outfits that make me feel blah?

Yes!!!!

Here's the thing: I'm a clothes horse. I love clothes, often enjoy shopping, and I have a lot of clothes. And still, I think it's way more sensible and rewarding to have only clothes that fit and make you feel good. For one thing, you'll capitalize on your closet real estate. For another, you'll always feel good about what you're wearing, no matter what you pull out of the closet. For a third, if the stuff you have is stuff you like, you, and other people, will have a better idea of what works for you, so that when you need to buy new clothes, you (and they, if you have the sorts of friends who keep their eyes open for your styles) will already know what works.

[juno.livejournal.com]

Yes. I've been on a less-is-more kick for a while. Conquer the clutter.

It's amazing the amount of clothing that you can accumulate and how little of it is really great. It can be hard to get rid of things and so all the suggestions that people have given above are the way to go. I've done 5 purges in the past year and still feel like there are things that I should get rid of.

[pixel.livejournal.com]

I have a bad habit of hanging onto things which sort of do the job even if I hate them or they don't quite work right. And whenever I *do* manage to get past that and replace something, I am always much happier with the replacement.

I did the clothes purge thing a couple of years ago. Now instead I've gotten really picky about clothes, and it makes me much happier to only wear stuff I like the look of (except for mens dress pants, I abhor them, but need them for work).

[mjlayman.livejournal.com]

When I got laminate put in earlier this year, I went through the whole condo like that because I had to pay to have stuff packed and moved and I wasn't paying for stuff I didn't want!

The immediate clothes problem is that one of my three sets of purple pants has become too tattered to wear and the company I bought them from has a new owner who no longer makes pants in nice colors. I have an awful lot of tops that go with purple pants, so I think I'll have to take the old pair and have a new pair made by a seamstress. (I haven't been able to sew since I became disabled.)

[nellorat.livejournal.com]

Congratulations! I may go months or even years without wearing something & still keep it in my closet, but I'd better still like it a lot. I go through my closet and drawers entirely every spring and fall, and each season I am more willing to get rid of clothes "just because."

[minnehaha.livejournal.com]

I sympathize with your unhappiness over button-down shirts, as I have the same problem. Gapping in front = never wear this.

K.

[chargirlgenius.livejournal.com]

I did the same thing last year. It needs to go in phases though. I have to do it again, and toss the stuff that I thought I was too attached to. It gets easier each time.

Why do you hate shopping though? I went from hating shopping to loving it, now that I have a better idea about what looks good on my body, and have given myself permission to buy things because they work, not because they're cheap. I also finally got over (mostly) the "I feel/look fat" by figuring out more flattering styles.

[redrose3125.livejournal.com]

Mary Dell has an amazing closet sorting algorithm:
http://www.scribd.com/doc/269216/Mary-Dells-Amazing-ClosetSorting-Algorithm