(no subject)

[rivka]

So, as is often the case, the night after the horrendous meltdown was not as bad. Yes, that damned 5:30 nap screwed up bedtime. Colin was up til 10:30. But I went to sleep at ten. When Michael brought him to me at 10:30 it took a grand total of five minutes to nurse him to sleep and get him into his crib.

Then he slept for four hours. That might not sound like much, but compared to how he has been doing lately it was freaking luxurious. And after that he only woke up one more time, at which point I brought him into our bed so I could nurse while sleeping.

Thanks for the problem-solving suggestions. It helps to get other points of view when we're so deep in the trenches we can't see daylight. I do think it might be teething; his drool production has been pretty epic. He may also be headed for a developmental milestone, which of course is a well-known sleep disrupter. Twice in the last couple of days he's produced what sounds like a new word, although honestly we're still very much in the "could that possibly have been what it sounded like?" stage. So maybe it's his tiny teeth and brain that aren't letting him sleep, and not our massive parenting fail.

We are planning to try a new experiment of enforced bedtimes for adults in our family. It's just too tempting, even when we're exhausted, to stay up much later than we should enjoying the opportunity for peace, quiet, and adult-directed leisure activities. I really think that we would feel better, have more energy, and get more done if we got more sleep. So we're going to try a full week of "in bed by 10:15, lights out by 10:30." Some nights that might mean no leisure time at all after the kids are asleep and the house is cleaned up, but I think we've got to try it anyway.

Comments

[shandra.livejournal.com]

Of course it is not a parenting fail. I will spare you my sleep story but my son does now sleep, at 4.5. Before 3, not so much.

This too shall pass, including getting leisure time back - but not this week.

[johnpalmer.livejournal.com]

If it's possible to do something that helps you get tired at the appropriate time, sleep might become an act of self-love. (For me, the key is that tiny bit of awareness that I'm tired - if I'm reading something I want to keep reading, then self-love seems more like "reading just a few more pages".)

If one of you is clearly more tired than the other (Michael doesn't post to LJ, so I don't know how tired he is - but you've been sounding exhausted!), some cuddling and massage can be a good way to do this.

Going from "I *have* to go to sleep!!!" to "ah, poor me, let's get me to bed, and rest..." helps me when I'm too wired and trying to do too much.

[kcobweb.livejournal.com]

Could you possibly convince yourself/ves that getting to bed early several nights in a row might rejuvenate you enough to properly enjoy an evening of adult-directed leisure activities? Tell yourself that you are going to bed early tonight and tomorrow night (and maybe Wednesday - see how you feel) but that Thursday night is tentatively scheduled for Fun. That way you have it to look forward to.

[ailbhe]

I know radegund sometimes has an enforced self-bedtime for a month at a stretch and it does do her the world of good. I keep meaning to try it but...

I really should.

[castiron.livejournal.com]

I'm also in the "should enforce an adult bedtime, and don't actually get around to it" group, though I've at least learned not to get the laptop out if I want to get to sleep before 1am.

(Also agreeing that teething sounds very plausible, given less willingness to eat plus sleep trouble.)

[fairoriana.livejournal.com]

I actually have usually been pretty good about the self-enforced bedtime (well, really the husband-enforced bedtime). I start feeling pretty darn sorry for myself after three or four consecutive days where I haven't had even half an hour of "adult-directed leisure time". (See also: haven't read LJ since Sunday night). I don't know how else to make it work. I trade in an hour of leisure for a next day of not feeling like crap.