(no subject)

[rivka]

I'm done with the grant.

Ordinarily, that would be cause for rejoicing. But the grant itself isn't quite done - it's due by close of business today, it's supposed to be in the hands of a courier by noon, and it's not done. It's driving me crazy not to be there for the last running-around minutes, helping finish it... but this is my clinic day, and I had a patient scheduled for 11am, which meant that I had to leave Baltimore to drive to the DC suburbs by 10:15.

My client called just as I walked into the clinic. She can't make it today, can we reschedule for Thursday? I don't have another client until one. I could have stayed with the grant for another two hours.

I could still be there now. I could be standing over Lydia snatching sections out of her hands to put in the references and get the damn thing done. I could be copying everything onto official NIH Continuation Pages. I could be writing in the page numbers by hand and copying everything into neat packets for the courier. Instead I'm here in the clinic with no one to see, apprehensive and impatient.

I called Lydia to see if there was anything she wanted to e-mail me to work on. Nope. She had someone helping her - Angela, the no-nonsense woman who's going to administer the grant. I have to trust Angela to get Lydia to get the grant out. I have to trust. I have to relax. Lydia will get the grant out.

I'd just feel so much better if I could be there until the end.

Comments

(soothe, soothe)

[wiredferret.livejournal.com]

It'll be fine. I know it's stressful for you, but it's all over but the shouting, and other people will handle it okay.

Go have a good lunch or something.

[klwalton.livejournal.com]

Oh, I understand! I'd want to be there for the finish, too.
Here's to it all going smoothly and well.

[kightp.livejournal.com]

Keep breathing, Rivka. Slow and easy.

You're working with professionals, right? They'll get that baby out the door.

Then you can start thinking about being there when the grant comes *in*!

[minnaleigh.livejournal.com]

Oh, I feel for you! I'm hopeless at relaxing and trusting someone else to do what's required. Particularly when there's some history of unreliability and I think I'm picking up a sense of that in your post. Anyway, I know you won't stop stressing until it's actually gone but here's hoping that the relief at having it finally finished makes it all worth it.

Re:

[rivka.livejournal.com]

Oh, I feel for you! I'm hopeless at relaxing and trusting someone else to do what's required. Particularly when there's some history of unreliability and I think I'm picking up a sense of that in your post.

*grin* Well. It's not so much that Lydia's unreliable, it's that I think she's a big-picture kind of person. Sometimes focus is an issue.

Anyway: everything's okay. She convinced the program officer to let her FedEx the grant tonight for delivery in the morning. So all's well that ends well... but sheesh.

[jinian.livejournal.com]

Oh, that sounds incredibly frustrating. I'm sorry. I'm sure it'll be all right.

[therealjae.livejournal.com]

Okay, this sounds *really* frustrating. I'd have a hard time not being terse with that client on Thursday.

Are things calmer today?

-J