Well, that was unpleasant.

[rivka]

We fired her. We said that it was a bad fit and not improving. She denied ever saying anything about the devil, recast the God story to make Alex's comment about the emperor of China the beginning of the conversation, and predicted that when we try with someone else we will find that Alex simply adjusts poorly to being left and none of this was her fault.

I can't think of anywhere else that Alex would have heard of the devil. We're very careful about media exposure, and her classmates all come from secular families.

We gave her a week of severance pay.

I feel surprisingly crappy for someone who just did the right thing for her child.

Comments

[crazysoph.livejournal.com]

Another de-lurking.

I found myself being particularly attentive to a part of the ex-nanny's exit speech:

She denied ever saying anything about the devil, recast the God story to make Alex's comment about the emperor of China the beginning of the conversation, and predicted that when we try with someone else we will find that Alex simply adjusts poorly to being left and none of this was her fault.

That underlined bit sounds very much to me like yet another application of the threat/scare strategy; particularly alarming if she's using it as a way to avoid getting fired or otherwise just not accepting responsibility. I could be reading into it more than is warrented (my own childhood issues, eh?), but after what you reported the previous time, this simply confirms that you've done exactly the correct thing by your child and yourself. I'm sorry you feel badly, but that seems unavoidable, given the personality of the nanny herself.

Crazy(and grateful you've taken the effort to record this where I can read this, and also greatful for your other commenters - so much experience and wisdom!)Soph

[green-knight.livejournal.com]

I think you've hit the nail on the head. This very much seems to be her modus operandi. It's frightening that she uses the same techniques with adults as she does with children, and it just proves how singularily unsuited she is for the job.

[hobbitbabe.livejournal.com]

Yeah, the fact that she lied to you and tried to manipulate you is ... consistent with how she treated Alex. It all sounds exhausting.

[(Anonymous)]

Thanks for saying what I was trying to say earlier in a much clearer way than I did. Of course firing anyone makes you feel crappy and I'm sorry for anyone who has to go through this. But I had intended to be focusing on any portion of the crappy feeling that was due to the particular way the nanny responded rather than on the general situation. I was merely trying to say what the immediately previous posters did: the nanny's behavior when she was told she was going to be fired was consistent with the behavior for which she was being fired. Perhaps this was too obvious to bother pointing out.

I'm extremely sorry if anyone took this wrong way or thought I was being unkind or implying that Rivka lacks empathy. That was definitely not my intent.

Grandma Susan