Well, that was humiliating.

[rivka]

Ironically, I was feeling vastly better for most of today. I've been going to work since Friday, but today I actually felt like I had a reasonable amount of energy rather than sitting at my desk exhausted. I felt normal. That lifted my spirits dramatically.

In the late afternoon I started to have a little shortness of breath, so I reached for my inhaler. I took a puff and started to cough. Then I coughed more and more. I realized that something was way wrong and jumped to my feet, but I only made it to the living room doorway before I started to throw up. Extensively. In front of Michael and both kids, who were desperate (Michael), loudly revolted (Alex), and freaked out (Colin).

Michael managed to get a trash can to me before it was too late to be of any use at all. He started a video to keep Colin out of the way and brought some rags, which I used to do an initial mopping-up. Then, while he mopped the floor, I went down to the basement laundry to take off all my clothes and start them and the rags washing in hot water.

At that precise moment, the doorbell rang. It was wcg, come to dinner while the house still reeked and I was naked and filthy in the basement. He was very kind about the whole thing, but OMG this was not a situation which I wanted to subject company to. He awesomely stayed and kept the kids entertained while necessary things like showering and bleaching the trash can and rewashing stuff took place.

I didn't cough anymore. I just felt disgusting and humiliated and revolting and like an awful scourge to my family.

At bedtime Alex declared that she would like her father to put her to bed. And then she said calmly, "Mom, I have a little secret to share with you. I like Dad better than I like you."

Well. Thank you, honey. That was just what this evening fucking needed.

Comments

[papersky.livejournal.com]

Even in Australia.

You could say "Me too!" I don't know if that would work, but it would at least be a possibly workable response? Or "Yes, Daddy absolutely rocks!" I mean it might be true and it would be perfectly OK if she did like Michael more than she liked you, as long as she still liked you a lot -- the problem is her saying it to be hurtful and divisive, and if she sees it works, she'll keep right on with it. And you can't outright say you like Daddy better than her, because that's probably half of why she's doing it, but a bit of general enthusiasm about Daddy might be worth a try?

Z once as a little kid coughed until he threw up. We went straight to the doctor, who looked at us like we were mad and told us that people do that sometimes, keep on with the cough medicine, it's not a big deal. Neither of us had ever done it, but apparently it's not a big deal, except for the carpet cleaning. We had a stain on the carpet forever until we sold the house because we didn't do it right away, we went to the doctor right away... Gah. Get well soon.

[rivka.livejournal.com]

I asked her, gently, how she would feel if Michael or I told her that we liked Colin better than her. She looked a little stunned and told me that she wouldn't like it at all. Well, neither did I. I said that all kids have times that they prefer one parent over the other, and that's normal and fine. But it's mean to say so.

She then went on to explain that because Daddy sees her less he does more of the fun things with her, and for example, she hates when we do math and handwriting. I got the impression that I could improve my standings if I promised to never teach anything but history. Which, frankly, is a little tempting.