rivka: (Default)
I arrived at work this morning to find the lobby dark. And the rest of the building, too. A few emergency lights in the halls - that was it. A cluster of people by the receptionist's desk informed me that the power would be out all day. The building was closing.

Ideally, I would have taken the day to do some Christmas shopping, or perhaps headed home for some cleaning and a nap. But Michael has the car, and the kids, today. If I go home, I'll have the kids as well.

So instead I headed over to the med school library. I haven't been here in ages; virtually every journal I might need can be accessed electronically from my office these days. Surprisingly, I was able to come up with some work tasks I can do without my own computer. So I am now ensconced in a fantastically comfortable lounge chair in front of a floor-to-ceiling window with a great city view.

I have a journal submission and a grant application to review. Sadly, I'll have to give up my comfy chair and find a computer station when it's time to actually submit them. Then I can also access the IRB website and get some business taken care of there. This may turn out to be a more-productive day, rather than less. My usual goofing-off sites are not as conveniently accessible from my phone.

...I wonder if there's any way I can smuggle this chair out of here. Seriously, I can't even begin to tell you how insanely comfortable it is.
rivka: (christmas squirrel)
I wrote a Christmas pageant this year, as I have done before. If you have an appetite for what is, by nature, a schmaltzy genre, take a look under the cut.

Read more... )
rivka: (motherhood)
Okay, honey, take a sip of water.
Good boy.
Another one.
Do you want your juice or your water?
Do you want to drink from your cup or your bottle?
Take three more sips.
First water, then Blue's Clues.
Just take a sip. Just taste it. It's good.
Do you want to drink from the cup or use a straw?
One more sip.
Swallow.
Try just a little bite of the jello. It's tasty.
Look at Alex! Alex is eating her jello. Colin try a bite.
Can I put jello in your ear? In your eye? In your nose? ...In your mouth?
Okay, drink some water.
Little more.
Little more.
Good boy. Another sip.
First juice, then see-see. Colin see-see after juice.
Good boy. Another sip.
Try a little more juice.
No, Colin, you must drink. Drink now. Little bit.
Good boy. Another sip.

...Uphill, all the way, we got another pint or so of liquid into him between the hospital and bedtime. Not counting breastmilk, because Sunday's experience tells me that the only rehydration I can count on is the stuff I can measure. He woke up coughing this morning and threw up a little (in our bed, thank you Colin) but his diaper was heavy and wet so we seem to have the dehydration beat. And he doesn't seem particularly sick this morning.

I watched him this morning vigorously practicing his jumping and remembered that yesterday morning, even while I packed up to go to the ER, I told myself that maybe Colin was doing better because for a little while he sat up straight on Michael's lap. Yeah. At the hospital, stripped of his clothes, he looked like one of those TV commercials about how pennies a day can save the life of a child in a developing country.

The thing about babies and toddlers is that they get sick really fast and then they recover really fast. By the time you fully understand how sick they were, they may already be better.
rivka: (Default)
When we arrived at the ER, Colin lay listlessly in my arms. He spoke in a whisper, and only a few words at a time. (Mostly "Mama?") His eyes were sunken into his face. When he cried - which he barely did; he mostly just lay there and stared - he didn't produce any tears.

When we left the ER two hours later, Colin was marching around the room singing "Seventy-Six Trombones."

That's the difference ten ounces of Pedialyte and half a Zofram (anti-nausea tablet) makes.

I don't know why he took Pedialyte in the hospital but not at home. They had the especially gross unflavored kind, even. But he guzzled the bottles down and asked for "more please" again and again - first in a whisper, and eventually with an indignant shout as he banged the empty bottle. Mercifully, it kept him IV-free. He produced the wet diaper necessary for discharge after the fifth two-ounce bottle.

He is sleeping peacefully now. We ought to be able to manage the rest of this at home: clear liquids and then bland foods, followed by a more normal diet tomorrow. They gave me an extra tab of Zofram if he needs it - or if Alex comes down with it next.

Every medical person we encountered in the last 18 hours has been fantastic.

Dr. Winkelstein, the doctor on call last night. We first spoke at 5:30. She told me to call back at 8 with an update, and after we'd checked in then she strongly encouraged me to call her in the middle of the night if I needed to. I did call her at 2:30am and she was awesome. Reassuring and not a bit tired-sounding. She helped me decide that it would be safe to wait until 6am to take him in to the ER. At 8, just as she was going off-shift, she called me to see how he was doing. When I didn't answer, she called the ER to see if we were there and if Colin was okay. The first three calls were just her doing her job, but that last one? Was the one that made her outstanding.

At the ER we didn't have to wait at all. There was a nurse at my side by the time we finished giving Colin's name and birthdate. Everyone went out of their way to greet Alex and say something friendly and supportive to her. (Mostly "wow, your mother is so lucky to have your help." Which I am.) They all listened to me very carefully. The doctor explained not only what we were going to try first, but also what we were going to try second and third, so that I had the whole protocol clear in my mind. Nobody made me feel like an idiot for not being able to get him rehydrated orally at home. The clerk didn't come to get the rest of our registration information (and proof of insurance, and copayment) until after Colin was markedly better. And - proof that they listened to me carefully - when they gave us our discharge instructions both the nurse and the doctor went out of their way to emphasize that breastmilk is considered a clear liquid and that Colin should nurse as much as he likes. Plenty of doctors don't keep that in mind for infants, let alone almost-two-year-olds.

I am so impressed with, and so grateful for, the care we received. Rehydration is pretty much a medical no-brainer, but to me that makes the good patient care even more impressive. They kept in mind that it wasn't a routine, worry-free procedure for us.
rivka: (her majesty)
At the ER. Colin still had no wet diaper by morning - twelve hours. Here, for some mysterious reason, he is perfectly happy to drink the nasty rehydration fluid he fought so hard against at home. Hoping we can avoid an IV.
rivka: (ouch)
About five o'clock Michael and I had a horrifying thought: when had we last changed Colin's diaper? In Williamsburg, that's when. Nine hours ago.

It was barely damp.

It turns out that when you're the kind of nursing mom who doesn't feel letdown, it's possible to nurse all day without noticing that your baby isn't drinking much.

Now we're doing a teaspoon of Pedialyte every three minutes. We're supposed to call the doctor back at eight.
rivka: (her majesty)
We're home. It could have been much worse.

Colin threw up once on the train and once on the sidewalk in Baltimore. In between he lay limp and floppy on my lap, barely speaking or moving. He asked several times for food. I hate when they're too young to understand why they have to be deprived. At least I could nurse him, and did. He seems to be keeping it mostly down, although not entirely.

Michael and Alex were awesome. But so were a bunch of other people:

The taxi driver at the Williamsburg train station. We were running late this morning, for tolerably obvious reasons. We got our stuff unloaded at the station with about 20 minutes left for me to return our rental car and get back to catch the train. I asked a taxi driver to lead me there and bring me back. He broke all kinds of speed limits and didn't even start the meter until I got in the cab.

The guy on the platform in Williamsburg who helped us put our bags on the train and the guy on the train who put our bags on the platform in Baltimore.

The conductors who went through the train telling everyone else that they couldn't have bags on the seat next to them because it was a crowded train, who somehow never got around to telling me the same thing.

The woman who made eye contact with me when I was comforting and cleaning up a recently-sick Colin, and smiled at us. Not, obviously, because there was anything cheerful about our situation, but because she wanted to send a message of sympathy and acceptance. That helped a lot.

It makes a difference. It really does. If you've ever done a small kind thing for someone in distress, allow me to thank you and tell you how much it mattered. The kindness of strangers is an awesome thing.
rivka: (ouch)
When Colin threw up last night he had a mouthful of food, and we figured that he choked. He seemed to feel perfectly fine.

Then this morning we took him down for the hotel breakfast and he threw up massive amounts of what seemed to be undigested breastmilk. All over the table. 90 minutes before our train.

He had dry heaves at the train station and threw up the few sips of water we'd given him.

I'm nursing him because he needs hydration rather desperately, but I fear the likely result. We've got a five-hour train journey on Amtrak's busiest day of the year. Because it's the end of our trip, Michael and I are down to one clean shirt each, and Colin has one clean outfit and one pair of pajamas. We do, at least, have a good supply of wet wipes and plastic grocery bags.

I wish to say, for the record, that I am not having fun.
rivka: (her majesty)
Members of my family who have vomited on this vacation: 2.
Members of my family who have had diarrhea: 2.
Members of my family who have been painfully constipated: 1.
Members of my family who have had a neon yellow runny nose: 1.
Members of my family who somehow scraped their forehead without anyone noticing: 1.
Impact of my residual breathing issues, in comparison: Negligible.
Thanksgiving in Williamsburg with [livejournal.com profile] chargirlgenius and family: priceless.
rivka: (I hate myself)
Ironically, I was feeling vastly better for most of today. I've been going to work since Friday, but today I actually felt like I had a reasonable amount of energy rather than sitting at my desk exhausted. I felt normal. That lifted my spirits dramatically.

tmi )
rivka: (wrong on the internet)
It's possible that, elsewhere on the net, I am going to be forced to kill someone.

"I was young and now I am old, yet I have never seen the righteous forsaken or their children begging bread." (Psalms 37:25) is quite possibly the most repellent and disgusting verse in the entire Bible, Y/Y?
rivka: (christmas squirrel)
I have no ideas for Christmas this year. Zero.

Inspire me. What do you think Santa should bring my kids? What should I ask for?
rivka: (alex & colin)
My kids are both fabulous in their own ways.

IMAG0377

IMAG0383
rivka: (books)
Person 1: We typically get our books from the library. I had never considered that some books may be banned from the American Library Association. I am sure that some of those books are extremely thought provoking reads. We are currently reading The Giver by Lois Lowry. I just happened to pick it up at a Yard Sale. What a great book. Our library will not carry that series, so I ordered the sequels from Amazon. I can see why it might be banned. It is sad and while I would not want my child to pick this up in the Children's section of the library and read it on their own, we are thoroughly enjoying reading it together.

Person 2: The ALA doesn't ban books-as a matter of fact it is strongly opposed to the banning of books. From their web site:

The ALA promotes the freedom to choose or the freedom to express one's opinions even if that opinion might be considered unorthodox or unpopular and stresses the importance of ensuring the availability of those viewpoints to all who wish to read them.

They do however maintain lists of books that have been banned and challenged. You can check out their web site and search "banned books" or "challenged books".

Person 1: This is good to know. I just found it on the Banned Books List and assumed it was "banned". I had never come across this before so I had no idea how it worked.


This massive misconception would fall more on the side of pure entertainment to me if Person 1 wasn't homeschooling her kids.
rivka: (her majesty)
I feel much, much better. The lunchtime dose of steroids was apparently the magic pill.

I am still being cautious. I am still planning to stay home tomorrow and sleep all afternoon. I am still keeping my finger over the speed-dial button for my doctor.

(Okay, the last one is an exaggeration, but we are watching this carefully and I will seek medical help if the upward climb is not steady.)

Thanks for the concern, advice, and good wishes.
rivka: (her majesty)
Home from work for the second day in a row.

Yesterday I felt okay in the morning. In the afternoon I had a fair amount of coughing, shortness of breath, and exhaustion. The evening was rough. This morning already I've had a bunch of coughing and wheezing. Now Michael has taken the kids to the science center and I am being very quiet and sitting very still. That helps a lot.

I remind myself that the steroids haven't even had 48 hours to work.

I'm a little nervous about this evening, because Michael has a board meeting and I'm going to have to get both kids to bed on my own. If I'm totally hardcore about resting all afternoon, I think I can do it. Alex is old enough to be helpful.
rivka: (Colin 1.5)
I wrote that developmental update while I was at my faculty retreat last week. Since then, Colin has picked up two awesome new things I want to share:

  • A while back he learned to sing "Goodnight Ladies." "Goodnight ladies, we're going to leave you now." Then he did a little experimentation with changing "ladies" into people's names: "Good night Mama, we're going to leave you now."

    This weekend he started changing the lyrics entirely. Michael left the dinner table to go to the bathroom, and Colin broke into song: "Good night, Daddy, going to pee potty." And this morning, as Alex settled in to watch her video: "Good night, Alex, going to Liberty's Kids show."


  • He's started carrying news. We went in to wake Alex up this morning, and he eagerly reported to her about his exciting new pajamas: "Alex! Colin dinosaurs on there!" Michael had a massive sneezing fit, and Colin came into the next room and told me excitedly, "Mama, Daddy sneezed! Daddy sneezed!"

    This isn't flat-out funny like singing "Good night, Daddy, going to pee potty," but it's a big developmental leap because it shows that Colin is starting to understand that everyone doesn't know what he knows. That's the beginning of a theory of mind.
rivka: (Colin 1.5)
colin

Here's how you can tell that Colin is not the oldest child in his family: at 21 months, his vocabulary includes the phrases "It's not fair!" and "I win!" And even more so: he instantly responds to someone else's "I win!" with "No, I win!"

That's what having a big sister does for you.

My last developmental update was three months ago, which is about a century ago in toddler-develompent time. One of the things that held me back from posting last month was that I couldn't get Colin to hold still long enough for me to take any pictures. I had about a hundred blurry pictures of toddler-in-motion. He's a busy, active little guy. He likes to trot around after Alex and do what she's doing. He likes to go up and down our many flights of stairs - walking, not crawling anymore. He likes to climb up on the furniture so he can reach high-up things he's not supposed to touch. He carries our little child-sized chairs from the playroom through the living room, hall, dining room, and kitchen so that he can reach treats on the pantry shelves.

Colin has an unnerving ability to figure out how to work electronics. He doesn't just pick up the camera and press buttons at random; he picks it up, turns it on, and takes a picture. He's figured out how to unlock my cell phone. He stands on a chair at Alex's computer, opens up the CD drives, puts in CDs, and closes the drives. He can turn on the CD player in his room and push play. We have to keep the printer unplugged, because otherwise Colin turns it on and wreaks havoc with the touch screen menus.

He loves trains and trucks and airplanes. We found Alex's old train set in the basement recently, and within about five minutes of bringing it upstairs it became Colin's favorite toy. He has an intense relationship with a small stuffed bunny named Bunny. He likes to have grownups build block structures he can play with. He likes Alex's Polly Pockets, which is particularly tedious because all he knows to do with them is bring them to a grownup to be dressed and undressed. Repeatedly. In the same outfit. He likes to watch YouTube videos; when he sees us at our computers he comes running over to ask "Watch boom de yada, watch dancing." He still loves to have us do Google Image searches for airplanes.

He desperately wants to take ballet. Every week when Alex takes her class: "Colin ballet class! Colin ballet class toooo!" Alex's class keeps the door closed, fortunately, so Colin stands in the doorway of the big kids' class next door and stares and stares. Later, he holds onto the furniture and moves his legs in quasi-balletic motion. It is tragic that he has another full year and a half before Colin ballet class too.

colin_contemplates

He loves books. He loves the same books over and over. The most common sentence that comes out of Colin's mouth is "Read-this me book please!" When we finish a book he likes to hear it again immediately. He's developed a new technique of turning pages backward until we get to the first page, apparently hoping that this way we won't notice that we're read-this book again please. He loves those informational books that have pages crammed full of labeled pictures. Thanks to these books, he has words in his vocabulary like Eurostar and flamingo and giant front-end loader. He also loves Go Dog Go and Knuffle Bunny and books about trucks and trains. He can recite a few favorite books from beginning to end. Sometimes I'll hear him just telling bits of a story to himself: "Now fussy, daddy. A choice. Bawled, waaaa! Boneless."

He likes to sing. Because of what he gets exposed to in our house, he mostly sings show tunes. It's a bit startling to hear a toddler break out at the dinner table with "Congress! Good God!" - until you realize how many times he's listened to the 1776 soundtrack. Now that The Music Man is Alex's new favorite musical, Colin is starting to pick up bits of "Goodnight, My Someone" and "Seventy-Six Trombones." He doesn't say any nursery rhymes or sing baby songs, so perhaps we need to shift our musical focus a bit.

He speaks very well for his age. "Colin go downstairs by self." "Mama carry the boy." "Want that one over there." "Wake up Mama! Mama shower. Daddy make coffee, Colin push button." "Fall down, bonk head." He meets any suggestion of a transition with an emphatic "No! Play more!" But he does have exquisite manners: "Frozen grapes please, Mommy. Thank-you-welcome." Or at dinner: "No thank you green beans, Mommy, don't care for it."

He sort-of sings the ABCs but, as far as I know, doesn't recognize any letters beyond C-for-Colin. He can count, though. He rote-counts up to fourteen or so very well, but I've also seen him count out objects - moving tiles from one pile to another, saying one number per pile, up to eight or nine. He knows his colors (except for some brown-black confusion) and his animals and his animal sounds. When Alex is doing math, Colin likes to stand on a chair next to her with a math book and pencil of his own. While I work with her, he scribbles earnestly on his page and murmurs math words. "What equals? ...plus two... seven, eight, fourteen." God help me if I give him blank paper and crayons instead of a math book, at math time. (Fortunately we use a free-to-print-out curriculum.)

He eats well, but is nevertheless tiny and skinny. He loves meat of any description, and will eat it faster than I can cut bites. And he loves vegetables: broccoli, carrots, cucumbers, peas, bell peppers. I have seen him eat half a cucumber at a time. I've recently cut back on his nursing, so now he's nursing 4-5 times a day instead of 15+ times a day. He still really loves to nurse.

His sleep continues to suck. I don't want to discuss it.

But he does make a mighty fine giraffe.

little_giraffe
rivka: (ouch)
So: that breathing issue I was having.

The inhaler I got last week worked really well for a while. It's not a "heavens open, choirs sing" experience like a nebulizer breathing treatment is. But I'd find that when the slow-strangulation feeling began to creep up on me, it was inevitably six hours after the last dose and time to use the inhaler again.

This morning I felt pretty well. We walked to church, although I then did a fair bit of coughing. We walked home from church, and afterward even though it had only been three hours since the last treatment I felt like someone was sitting on my chest. I decided it would be okay to take the dose at four hours instead of six.

I went and picked up the visiting [livejournal.com profile] oursin and had a lovely time chatting with her and showing her a bit of Baltimore. As time wore on I had more and more coughing, though, and had to keep my breathing very carefully shallow. When I came home at 3:45 it had only been two hours and a bit since the last dose, and I couldn't catch my breath and couldn't catch my breath.

I started noticing that it was quite an effort to take those careful shallow breaths: pull-push, pull-push. My head hurt. I felt lightheaded.

Michael and I spent some time debating our options. In the end, the whole family piled in the car and Michael drove me to Patient First, an urgent-care clinic. My breathing continued to be shallower and more labored and more uncomfortable. At Patient First, I got to jump the line and be taken straight back.

Hosanna! They gave me another breathing treatment, almost right away, and it was fantastically wonderful. It did turn out that all the incredibly hard work I was doing was paying off: my pulse ox was 97%. So I wasn't as oxygen-starved as I felt. I had the breathing treatment and a chest X-ray. I came home with steroids and antibiotics. The doctor swears that the steroids will make me instantly better. Here's hoping.

I was mightily impressed with the care experience. Everyone at Patient First was kind and seemed to take me seriously. The best part of their model: prescriptions are fully integrated into their service. It's not that the Patient First doctor writes a prescription and then you walk down the hall to the Patient First pharmacy to have it filled; the doctor talked to me, walked out of the room for a minute or two, and came back with my medications himself. Not samples, either, but regular medication packs labeled with my name and bearing full pharmacy education sheets. Not having that extra step makes a huge difference when you're really sick.

The breathing treatment lasted me from then until now. Those things really are awesome. It was so scary to just not be able to breathe like that, and to have it worsen so quickly from a previously managable level.
rivka: (Colin 1.5)
Colin, clinging to Michael: Want Mommy carry boy.
Michael: hands Colin off to me.
Colin, clinging to me, head on my shoulder:
Want Daddy.
Me: Do you want Mommy or Daddy?
Colin: Want BUNNY.

Once he had Bunny in his arms he was perfectly content. Mommy, Daddy, whatever.

IMAG0355

(He starts out in a crib, but at some point in the early morning hours he winds up in our bed. So does Bunny.)

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